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Standing for marriage--with or witout legal counsel?

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Posted by: KSunshine'sMIRACLE

Standing for marriage... I don't want a divorce(OBVIOUSLY) and am trusting God to bring my husband back.

I just talked to an atty. and the retainer is $4000. I can't afford that. So I am not sure what to do about finances and other stuff to "protect" myself but I can't afford the atty. Can someone help me? Maybe you've had experience doing it on your own or can offer me some advice if I tell you about the situation. Maybe there is a lawyer who could help me a little and just tell me what is ok and what isn't. I've been threatened already about him coming to pick up his stuff and not being here, but I am gonna hafta back down even though I have the right to be here, because if not he is gonna insist on doing it what he calls the hard way and go to court to make it so he can come with me not being here...he really doesn't want to see me! Too bad because I am so much a better person thanks to GOD! Can anyone help me? You don't have to be an expert just maybe you are doing it too or have done it or have legal wisdom. Should I just do whatever he wants? Thanks in advance. I am asking for God to guide me but I need some serious answers soon, some even tonight, as I have to email him back soon with answers. Even though he is so angry I am going to let him see how unconditional my love is.

Blood of Jesus all over us and the situation, Lord!
PRAISE GOD!

(Poll is just for sort of an idea, I dunno if I could say "fun", just something to do...if you aren't sure or don't think either then please DON'T vote!)


Posted by: kmath

Father I pray for Ksunshine. Please lead her and guide her in your perfect plan. I know that you have a plan in all of this. I pray you would enable her to exhibit a Christ-like attitude no matter what. I pray she would surrender to you and allow you to lead her each and every step. I praise you Jesus for how you will deliver her. I pray you will block the divorce and that you will soften her husband's heart. Heal him Father of whatever is causing him anger. May he feel the presence of Jesus upon him now, healing him and restoring his soul. I pray that he would experience the fullness of your grace and your Holy Spirit. May his eyes be opened to the truth about you and your Word.
AMen.

Ksunshine, I haven't been thru the legal side of things, but I would encourage you to seek Christ for every detail. Seek his counsel, not the counsel of man. If he wants you to have an attorney, He will make a way. If not, you will have the Wonderful Counsellor by your side. Know that he is fighting your battle. All you need to do is be still ( easier said than done) Trust God to bring the victory! Amen.


Posted by: soon

Hi, I am Soons Mom, I would suggest that you get in contact with a "battered women's" shelter for information on a "restraining order" that will hopefully cost you nothing. I don't know what state you live in and what is offered to you for someone without funds, but in my county there is this kind of help for women being threatened by their husbands. Call around until you find help. You need a restraining order for your protection since your husband is making threats. Where I live, you can get your papers from a women's shelter, do the leg work to get them processed and it costs you nothing. Please use Godly wisdom in protecting yourself. Remember that this battle is not between flesh and blood, but with the powers of darkness. Get going sister! Get out the yellow pages and start searching. Also, there is a possibility that your husband may be just making threats about getting a lawyer to manipulate you with a feeling of helplessness because he knows that you do not have appropiate funds to hire one of your own. Please be encouraged and know that you are going to get through this... Father, in the name of your son Jesus, I lift this women of God up to you and we join our faith together concerning this situation. Lord, we know that nothing is too hard for you and that you are very concerned about every detail of Ksunshine's life. I ask that you place a hedge of angels around her and protect her from all harm...give her divine direction Lord and peace in the midst of the storm. Lord, she needs your comfort and your strength to get through this situation. I ask you to open the doors that need to be open, to get her the legal help that she needs. Father, I ask you to convict her husband for any ungodly behavior toward Ksunshine and draw him close to you by your Holy Spirit. Speak to his heart Lord Jesus and bring comfort and peace to him. Let him experience the power of your love Lord and deal with him about the issues that cause him to want to be separated from his wife. Help him to Lord to meet You at the foot of the cross and to turn his life over to You. I come against every demonic force that is operating in his life and I bind you Satan and I command you in the mighty name of Jesus to take your hands off Ksunshine's husband. Let him go free! I plead the blood of Jesus over him. We stand in faith Lord for his deliverance and for the salvation of this marraige. Lord, we ask you to place a desire in this man's heart to serve you and to be a man of God...a husband that loves and nurtures his wife...one that esteems her Father and walks upright before You. We thank you Lord that by faith we know that you are working in Ksunshine's life and in her husband's life. Help them both to hear your voice and to walk in your love. In Jesus' Mighty Name...Amen

Please read James Chapter 1:1-8 Stand on God's word for all your needs and do not waver...His word does not return void, but accomplishes what It says It will do. Be PATIENT and DILIGENT! Do not believe the lies of your enemy Satan. You are more than a conqueror through Christ Jesus and nothing is impossible to those who believe! Watch what words you speak, for death and life are in the power of your tongue. Speak life to your marraige in the midst of the storm. Find scripture to stand on and speak those scriptures over and over every day. Stand and see the salvation of the Lord!


Posted by: Kari

Kerri,
I would just trust completely in the Lord for this. Not getting an attorney is showing that you believe in His power to answer your prayers in His time. There may be a legal aide available through your human resource deptment that could just give you free advice on the legal stuff though. I will continue to pray for your situation and be assured that HE will answer your prayers.


Posted by: nlyalad@sbcglobal.net

No Attorney, I Think You Shoul Pray About Asking Your Husband To Wait Because You Both Have No Funds And Tell Him You Would Be Willing To This In A Nice Manner, That Attorneys Just Want Your Money, You Know What I Mean?


Posted by: KSunshine'sMIRACLE

Hi
thanks so far

in response...
HE is the one who wants the restraining order so that he can make sure he doesn't see me! I don't want or intend to cause any touble and have said so more than once, but he insists that I am not present at this point.

He's already got the atty. and I did email him and ask him if we could just handle it on our own between us as it's expensive etc. He didn't answer but hasn't gotten rid of the atty. Basically just ignored it. I He is "firm". He already has easy ways and hard ways worked out apparantly, it all seems ridiculously hard to me.

I think I should not have one too in many ways, it seems sweeter of me not to... it's just that they've already come across so threateningly! And I am not sure about a specific financial thing I have to do...snd psying debt off. I haven't done anything bout it yet and don't want to appear difficult but just dunno what to do! He doesn't really communicate with me, I just get orders so I haven't been able to explain the situation to him.

He is very cold so far and like stone, unmoving. Wouldn't you expect his atty. to have the correct spelling of her client's name in the letter though? Revieved a letter which is badly written and my husand's first name isn't even spelled correctly.

anything more specifc please pm or email me, don't want to throw too much more out here...
thank you!

Praise God, God bless!


Posted by: StarChilde

You know I love you sis... I will pray in the spirit for you~*hugs*


Posted by: Covenant Keeper

Quote:
Originally Posted by KSunshine'sMIRACLE
Standing for marriage... I don't want a divorce(OBVIOUSLY) and am trusting God to bring my husband back.

I just talked to an atty. and the retainer is $4000. I can't afford that. So I am not sure what to do about finances and other stuff to "protect" myself but I can't afford the atty. Can someone help me? Maybe you've had experience doing it on your own or can offer me some advice if I tell you about the situation. Maybe there is a lawyer who could help me a little and just tell me what is ok and what isn't. I've been threatened already about him coming to pick up his stuff and not being here, but I am gonna hafta back down even though I have the right to be here, because if not he is gonna insist on doing it what he calls the hard way and go to court to make it so he can come with me not being here...he really doesn't want to see me! Too bad because I am so much a better person thanks to GOD! Can anyone help me? You don't have to be an expert just maybe you are doing it too or have done it or have legal wisdom. Should I just do whatever he wants? Thanks in advance. I am asking for God to guide me but I need some serious answers soon, some even tonight, as I have to email him back soon with answers. Even though he is so angry I am going to let him see how unconditional my love is.

Blood of Jesus all over us and the situation, Lord!
PRAISE GOD!

(Poll is just for sort of an idea, I dunno if I could say "fun", just something to do...if you aren't sure or don't think either then please DON'T vote!)



Father God, let KSunshine's Miracle know what she is to do. I pray that she always goes to you before anyone else. Restore back what the locust has eaten. In Jesus' name. We give You all the glory, God.

KSunshine's Miracle, ask God what He wants you to do. God lead me to not use an attorney(and in the natural, there was a lot to lose) and to sign the papers. By my submitting to my husband, I was obedient to God. I turned the control over to God, so He could could work in my husband's life. I am still trusting in God.

God directed me to Restoreministries*****. I have learned so much. God is really using this ministries to help hurting spouses.


Posted by: Praying For Restoration

Hi Sweetie,

What a beautiful heart you have for your lord and for your husband.

If the Lord leads you to find an attorney, there are many who cost less. My retainer was $2500, but I've had to continue to pay more than that as the retainer ran out. In my state, I found attorney's for anywhere from $125 an hour to $500 an hour. Each office will charge differently for things like photocopying, etc. There are also "legal aid" groups. They are often no cost or very low cost. Call your local bar association for a recommendation. I know someone personally who works for such a place, and he is a very smart and good attorney. In my state, the court system also has legal advisors (who are legally bound NOT to really advise, you, IYKWIM). Anyway, they are there specifically to help those without an attorney, who are representing themselves.

I found that NO ONE did pro bono. Everyone said, "Well, I donate my time to a committee . . ." ("What committee?", I wondered!) However, I have had some help from a Christian divorce attorney who was recommended to me by a large, local church. You may want to give several churches a call and ask to speak to their pastoral care department. Explain your situation, and how you don't want a divorce but may need legal help in order to respond to your husband's. It may take a lot of calls, but someone may know of someone who would at least give you some help with legal advice. They may be rather against standing, however, so you'd have to take their words with some caution.

Anyway, I hope that helps some. It is so hard, and I know I felt under attack when those papers were delivered, etc. I may soon be in the position of having to represent myself. It is so hard.

Blessings to you.