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Kids are so funny!!!

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Posted by: MaryTemp

Funnies...these are too cute!!! I had to share them!!! Enjoy!!!

One Sunday in a Midwest City, a young child was "acting up" during the morning worship hour. The parents did their best to maintain some sense of order in the pew, but were losing the battle. Finally, the father picked the little fellow up and walked sternly up the aisle. On his way out just
before reaching the safety of the foyer, the little one called loudly to the congregation, "Pray for me! Pray for me!"

One particular four-year-old prayed, "And forgive us our trash baskets, as we forgive those who put trash in our baskets."

A little boy was overhead praying: "Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it. I'm having a real good time like I am."

A Sunday School teacher asked her little children, as they were on their way to church service, "And why is it necessary to be quiet in church?" One bright little girl replied, "Because people are sleeping."

The preacher was wired for sound with a lapel mike, and as he preached, he moved briskly about the platform, jerking the mike cord as he went. Then he moved to one side, getting wound up in the cord and nearly tripping before jerking it again. After several circles and jerks, a little girl in the third pew leaned toward her mother and whispered, "If he gets loose, will he hurt us?"

Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother Joel were sitting together in church. Joel giggled, sang, and talked out loud. Finally, his big sister had had enough. "You're not supposed to talk out loud in church." "Why? Who's going to stop me?" Joel asked. Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, "See those two men standing by the door? They're hushers."


My grandson was visiting one day when he asked, "Grandma, do you know how you and God are alike?" I mentally polished my halo while I asked, "No, how are we alike?" "You're both old." He replied.

A ten-year-old, under the tutelage of her grandmother, was becoming quite knowledgeable about the Bible. Then, one day, she floored her grandmother by asking, "Which Virgin was the mother of Jesus? The Virgin Mary or the King James Virgin?"

I had been teaching my three-year-old daughter, Caitlin, The Lord's Prayer. For several evenings at bedtime, she would repeat after me the lines from the prayer. Finally, she decided to go solo. I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word, right up to the end of the prayer "Lead us not into temptation," she prayed, "but deliver us some E-mail. Amen."

A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, Kevin, 5, and Ryan, 3. The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake. Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson. "If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, 'Let my brother have the first pancake, I can wait.'" Kevin turned to his younger brother and said, "Ryan, you be Jesus."

A Sunday School class was studying the Ten Commandments. They were ready to discuss the last one. The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what it was. Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted, "Thou shall not take the covers off the neighbor's wife."


Posted by: cgirl



















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Posted by: czynka

Thanks for the giggle Mary !!!!

Reminds me of Chinook when she was small. She was in bed and was having difficulty in concentrating and keeping her eyes closed to pray. So i suggested she imagined heaven in her thoughts, and asked her if she could see all the beautiful streets of gold,and she said she could,. Then i asked her if she could see all the lovely shiny glittery jewels studded all around, and she said she could. So then i asked her if she could see the river of life, such an amazing shade of blue, and calm and soooooo beautiful, flowing from the throne of God. She said she could see that too. Can you see the throne as well, i asked, with a rainbow around it, and the light of God shining so brightly...... yep, that too, she could see it. i was really getting into it by now. Can You see Jesus standing next to the throne i asked.
No, she said.
Well, what do you see then? i asked, anticipating a really awesome reply.
Mickey Mouse, she said.


Posted by: MaryTemp

Quote:
Originally Posted by czynka
Thanks for the giggle Mary !!!!

Reminds me of Chinook when she was small. She was in bed and was having difficulty in concentrating and keeping her eyes closed to pray. So i suggested she imagined heaven in her thoughts, and asked her if she could see all the beautiful streets of gold,and she said she could,. Then i asked her if she could see all the lovely shiny glittery jewels studded all around, and she said she could. So then i asked her if she could see the river of life, such an amazing shade of blue, and calm and soooooo beautiful, flowing from the throne of God. She said she could see that too. Can you see the throne as well, i asked, with a rainbow around it, and the light of God shining so brightly...... yep, that too, she could see it. i was really getting into it by now. Can You see Jesus standing next to the throne i asked.
No, she said.
Well, what do you see then? i asked, anticipating a really awesome reply.
Mickey Mouse, she said.


LOL!!! That is too funny Carrie-Ann!!! I know my kids say some very funny things too. When my daughter Stephanie was 4 she had to go into the hospital to have tubes put in her ears and have her tonsils removed. We had one prior visit there where we ate in the cafeteria, and she really wanted to eat there again. Only she couldn't remember the name so we were waiting in the doctors office at her follow-up and she said "mommy", "when we are done can we go eat in the ummm "Bacteria"!? LOL we were rolling, actually what she said was probabally quite profound!!!




Posted by: mustoffolus55

Those stories were so precious, I remeber when my daughter, melissa was 4 yrs old, her older sister was having her first baby, I was sitting on the porch, and explained to melissa that she would soon be an aunt, when her sister had the baby. After thinking about this for a moment, she replied that she would not crawl on the ground for noone, not even a baby. GB