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I am crying inside, I need someone to pray for my husband and my marriage!

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Posted by: oneinneedofprayer

First he needs to be saved, filled with salvation and spirit filled. He needs to have a mind filled with God-like thoughts and temptation needs to be bound out of his life for good. He knows he is doing wrong out in the world, but for some reason it's like he can't stop doing wrong. I have prayed and cried out to God for 2 years. I can't pray by myself. I need strength and support. I feel like I am dying inside because the man I married doesn't want to live right, do right or even do right by God and that bothers me and our young baby daughter. For the whole time I was pregnant he put me through but after she was born it has gotten worse. We live in the same house and he barely spends time with our daughter. He may work all day and come and want to go hang out in the street doing who knows what. I want to live right and he wants to live wrong and I don't know how to change this situation except by asking for prayer. This situation is so bad that even my daughter is suffering. I know there are some powerful prayer warriors on this site. Please help me pray that God will save and deliver my husband.


Posted by: StevenHenderson

God is definitely helping you. I believe that your heart hurts so much because God has given you a great gift. To know kind of how He feels when someone chooses not to be with Him. It is a special Gift from God to have the desperation you have. And it is Him Helping you, working side by side, even to pray the prayer that you just posted. You have conveyed the thoughts of God, and He is working through you to Help you husband. The reason why I capitalize Help is because I am referring to the Holy Spirit. He is your Helper. He gives us the thoughts and desires of God so we know what to pray for. So I will join with you in prayer, that your husband becomes the man that God wants him to be. Like Jesus. I pray that you continue to have prayers from God to pray for your husband, and that Jesus will put more people in your life to help you battle, to wrestle God for your blessing, and to agree with you. In Jesus’ name, Amen.


Posted by: JenGaston

Quote:
Originally Posted by oneinneedofprayer
First he needs to be saved, filled with salvation and spirit filled. He needs to have a mind filled with God-like thoughts and temptation needs to be bound out of his life for good. He knows he is doing wrong out in the world, but for some reason it's like he can't stop doing wrong. I have prayed and cried out to God for 2 years. I can't pray by myself. I need strength and support. I feel like I am dying inside because the man I married doesn't want to live right, do right or even do right by God and that bothers me and our young baby daughter. For the whole time I was pregnant he put me through but after she was born it has gotten worse. We live in the same house and he barely spends time with our daughter. He may work all day and come and want to go hang out in the street doing who knows what. I want to live right and he wants to live wrong and I don't know how to change this situation except by asking for prayer. This situation is so bad that even my daughter is suffering. I know there are some powerful prayer warriors on this site. Please help me pray that God will save and deliver my husband.

I know you are really hurting and you want God to desperately answer your prayers delivering your husband from the cluthes of Satan. The best prayer to pray is Lord Let your will be done because you will that no man should perish but come to repentence and have everlasting life. Then put it in God's hands and leave it there! How do you do that is don't look at the situation with disgust but just look at that situation and say Thank you Lord for everything that is going wrong ! The reason I said that is the best prayer to pray is because alot of times we are praying our will and to pray for the will of God then to wait on him the Lord will answer your prayer! Although it may not be the way we wanted him to answer our prayer but God will answer! So just began to ask the Lord to Let his will be done and then pray and ask the Lord to change you what areas in your life needs some improvements. If we as Chrisitans would really allow the Holy Spirit to shine through then the oppressor would not be able to inflict so much pain on us because the presence of the lord would be so strong in our life until the oppressor will break down and say what must I do to be saved? Do you feel me! I know it hurts and I know how bad it can get. When the two of you first got married did you marry him in the world if so or has he back slidden from the Lord if he has back slidden then the Lord is married to the back slidder! If he was not saved when you first married him then you sure cannot save him or turn his life around now but what you can do; is YOU TOTALLY surrender unto to the Lord and God will do the rest. He can restore your marriage! GOD GRANT ME THE SERENITY TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT CHANGE THE COURAGE TO CHANGE THE THINGS THAT I CAN AND THE WIDSOM TO KNOW THE DIFFERENCE! Now you do know that there is not nothing to hard for the Lord. With God all things are possible! We must first give it to the Lord and DO NOT TAKE IT BACK!


Posted by: oneinneedofprayer

Steven,

No one has ever put such kindness into words. I have people around me now who have told me to cleanse my house of demons and spirits and even told me to sprinkle water around the house. I feel like you felt, like I am dying inside because all of this has taken so much stress on me. I am saved but my husband isn't and everyday he seems to be getting worse. I only have one true friend to pray with on my marriage. I have very little support. I don't know if he is being faithful or not, but he keeps giving me the impression that he isn't. Just the other day, I asked him where he had been he told me that he didn't have to tell me where he goes when he leaves our house. We have an 8month old daughter and she is suffering, I can see it in her eyes. She rather come to me than go to him, and he doesn't understand how much she needs him. I am praying that God will save and deliver my husband. When I read you testimony, I just feel like I know that God can change him. Right now I sit and type and I am just crying out to God asking him to please change him now. I have been going though for such a long time, I just want the peace, joy and happiness you described in you testimony. I want him to stop fearing churches and to give his life over to God (and stop using church as an excuse). We have only been married for 2 years but everyday of those 2 years has been so horrible for me. Please pray for me so that I can soon testify like you have done. That has been my ultimate goal.











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Posted by: StevenHenderson

I think that we were both writing each other at the same time! Anyway, this is what my wife and I wrote concerning the prayer above… Oh, ya… my wife suggests to quietly pray for him and lay your hands on him while he is sleeping, nothing showy or loud, just sincere. We don’t suggest to do this if you think that he might wake up and flip out, but my wife says that she has seen awesome results when herself and other women have done this. So if you can safely do it, my wife says that it worked miracles for me! And I never even knew she was doing it! Until now… Ha! And my wife wants to stress that she thinks you should pray:
-Lord make him the man of God You have created him to be.
-Lord make him the father You have created him to be.
-Lord make him the husband You have created him to be.
Anyway here’s what we wrote, it’s long but we believe that it’s of the Lord, from Him, to us, to you.
Love,
Steven and Alesha.

Oneinneedofprayer, praying the will of God is a great prayer. However, praying for somebody to get saved, to be filled, and to live his life for Jesus, is the will of God.

“The Lord is not slack concerning His promise, as some count slackness, but is longsuffering toward us, not willing that any should perish but that all should come to repentance.” 2 Peter 3:9a

It is your job to pray for your husband, and it is the Holy Spirits job to Help you. We are supposed to wrestle God for what we know is right. That is why we are called the children of Israel, which means: Those who have struggled with God and with men and have prevailed. (Genesis 32:28)

In Philippians 4:6 it says, Do not be anxious over anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication along with thanksgiving let your petitions be made known to God.

We are supposed to pray, and we are supposed to keep praying, and the Holy Spirit will Help us pray even when we don’t know what to pray for (Romans 8:26). So it is a good thing to pray for the will of God, and I am glad that my wife prays the will of God for me… but I am even more glad that He gives her specific prayers to pray for me. And that’s what it is all about… having a personal relationship with God, a Friend that would and did die for you.

“In the same way, you wives must accept the authority of your husbands, even those who refuse to accept the Good News. Your godly lives will speak to them better than any words. They will be won over by watching your pure, godly behavior.” 1 Peter 3:1

How do you lead a godly life, with pure, godly behavior? Well it’s impossible, but that is why we have the Holy Spirit, to help us do the impossible. Because He is God, and He will Help you do things that you can’t do on your own. This is another thing that takes prayer to accomplish. It is also right to thank God for the Good and the bad things in our lives (Phil 4:11-13…). We learn to do that, slowly, during our walk with Him. But we are not just to give our bad times to God and just leave it alone. What is better is to use the hardships and trials that we have to build our relationship with God, by praying and talking to Him. Don’t give up. God wants to use what you are going through to help you get to know Him, and that He can do anything! He can Help you succeed at not doing the things that you know you aren’t supposed to do, but do them anyway, despite your best efforts. And He can Help you succeed at winning your husbands heart toward Christ. All in all, this pain will give you a testimony to tell others, and that is what God uses, and gives us to beat the devil. And look at Job (Job Chp.1). He was a righteous man, I believe one translation states that he was perfect in all his ways. But God still allowed the devil to tempt him. How do you allow the Holy Spirit to shine through? It’s easy enough to say, but in the end condemning to a person who doesn’t know how. You could say that Job knew how to let Holy Spirit shine through. He was perfect in all of his ways… It is only by God’s Spirit that we can be even close to perfect, period. Yet the devil was still allowed access to Job. You see when God tests us, yes, the test is for us… but more so the test is for God, for Him to see if what He has made is ready for the next refinement process. So if you fail a test, don’t beat your self up, learn from it, get a better understanding of what to do next time, and talk to God about it. Always run to Him, not away from Him, as Jerry has often told me. And when you’re talking to God say, “Hey, Friend, I guess you got some more work to do, I biffed that one big time, please keep changing me and molding me so next time I will pass.” See we are the clay and God is the Potter, we don’t change ourselves by our own power, God changes us by His power. “Not by might, nor by power but by My Spirit says the Lord of Hosts”. Zechariah 4:6b. Our job is to just stay on the wheel (John 15:1-8). And we do that by prayer, learning His voice, and learning to obey Him. Do not just say, “Lord let Your will be done,” and leave it there… use your pain to your advantage, use it to help you pray to God, and to build your relationship with Him. I pray for the Lords will to be done, but in most cases that I do, it’s when I don’t know what the Lords will is. You know what the Lords will is for your husband, so pray it… as often as you are able. I pray let the Lords will be done when it comes to my wife and I having another baby… I pray it when someone asks me to pray for them that God will give them a million dollars… The point is, I pray it when I don’t know what He wants, and when I just want what He wants. It is God's will that your husband gets saved, and that your marriage stays together… The Bible says that, “For the Lord God of Israel says that He hates divorce…” (Malachi 2:16) We all know that people get divorced, that scripture doesn’t mean that He hates the people… and when people get divorced and continue to choose to trust in the name of the Lord, He will always work every thing together for good (Rom 8:28), and allow their pain to give them a testimony. So here’s is what you get to do, you get to learn to know God… The closer you get to Him, the easier it will be to discern His voice… and the more you know God’s voice the more you will know when He is talking to you… here’s my point, if any of the scriptures that you read sound condemning, and deadly, well that’s not God reading them to you, it's the devil or your flesh. When God reads the Bible, when the Author reads his work to you, He will always use it to bring you Life. For the devil comes to steal, kill and destroy, and Jesus came to bring life and life more abundantly (John 10:10). It’s like having a teacher read Shakespeare, how much better would it be to have Shakespeare himself read it to you? How much more would you learn? It’s kind of the same thing with God, He can make even the most condemning, deadly sayings in the Bible bring life to His children. Anyway, I hope all this helps.
-Steven & Alesha

"For I have chosen you and will not throw you away. Don't be afraid, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you. I will help you. I will uphold you with my victorious right hand."
Isaiah 41:…9-10

"I am holding you by your right hand- I, the LORD your God. And I say to you, Do not be afraid. I am here to help you… I am the LORD, your Redeemer. I am the Holy One of Israel."
Isaiah 41:13-14

"I, the LORD have called you to demonstrate my righteousness. I will guard and support you…
Isaiah 42:6…

"I, the LORD, made you, and I will not forget to help you."
Isaiah 44:…21

"…the LORD who created you says: 'Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you. I have called you by name; you are mine. When you go through deep waters and great trouble, I will be with you. When you go through rivers of difficulty, you will not drown! When you walk through the fire of oppression, you will not be burned up; the flames will not consume you.'"
Isaiah 43:...1-2

"The Lord says, 'I will rescue those who love me. I will
protect those who trust in my name. When they call on me,
I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue them and
honor them. I will satisfy them with a long life and give them
my salvation.'" Psalms 91:14-16


Posted by: oneinneedofprayer

Steven and Alesha,

Thank you for the advice yesterday. I got a chance to read your response late evening yesterday and I took sometime out to think about what you had to say. You were so right and I need to hear those words because I haven't heard them in such a long time. Thank you! I took the advice of your wife this morning and instead of laying hands on him, I took a picture of him and prayed just the same. I know it is my duty to pray for him, but do you know the one thing that hurts so much? When he does something wrong, he never apologizes for it. I had the worse pregnancy because of all the stress he put me under. He never apologized for it. I have forgiven him, time after time, then things will be okay for a few days and then he does something to mess up our relationship again. A few weeks ago I was so tired from work and care of the baby, so I decided to rest the whole day and not do anything. The baby slept so I decided to watch tv and rest. When he came home from work, he cursed me out because I didn't wash the dishes and then threw them out the back door. It's hard to live with a man like this. His ex before me, I hear how he treated her like a queen and he wanted to marry her and she decided they should end their relationship, moved out of town and started a new life. He treats me like doormat and I haven't done anything but forgiven him and loved him the best way that I can. Sometimes I pray all night, I wake up and pray, sleep then wake up again. I feel like I am paying for the pain that she caused him, because I can't believe he was like this before. I prayed all night the will of God to be done in his life. I even woke up this morning and continued. Prayed with my prayer partner and confessed to God all the pain and hatred that I had developed for him. I cried out to God and expressed that I am tired of being treated so badly when all I do is try to love him and try my best to make a good life with him. I wouldn't treat anybody like he's treated me. You said in your testimony on your site that your wife had some problems from childhood in how she was raised. My husband wasn't raised by either of his parents. He was raised by his grandmother and she had to raise his siblings as well. He has told me many of times how he prayed to God for a family, someone to love him and someone he can love, respect and do right by. He has more than he could ever thank God for and he spends the day purposely sabotoging our relationship. Please continue to offer your advice and prayers. It is helping more than you know.


Posted by: StevenHenderson

Oneinneedofprayer, I know how hard it can be when somebody doesn’t apologize for something that they did wrong. We can forgive them all we want to, but sometimes deep down we hold onto things that hurt us… without knowing how to let them go. And when these people don’t apologize, or give any sense that something needs to be said, it’s hard for us as human beings to have any sort of closure. God will bring you Justice. He did for us. So many people did so many things wrong and hurtful to us, we forgave them, and that was our job, but it was God who did all the work to bring us closure concerning the hurt and pain. He brought about many of those people’s apologies and renewed our relationships with them. So I understand why you need to know that he cares, by saying… “Hey, I’m sorry.” And that is a perfectly natural feeling to have. How are you going to spend the rest of your life with somebody who doesn’t seem to care enough to apologize to you? By the Grace and Power of God. And He will change your husband. Now sometimes we may never get any closure, I pray that you do, but my point is, is that God can help you let go of the hurt inside of you. He has for me. Sometimes we hurt inside for reasons we know, and sometimes for reasons we don’t know. Sometimes we hurt for reasons we know of, but have no idea on how to let it go… even though we forgave and forgave and forgave. So I think that you need to allow God to do some work on you. And you ask… How do I do that? Here’s how I do it… right before I go to bed, most every night, I spend time with God. I just lay there, on my back with my hands over my heart. I talk to Him, tell Him what ever is on my heart and mind… sometimes I don’t say much at all, I just try to listen. What I have understood is that God is always talking to me, it’s just that I can’t always hear Him… I know the church says that kind of stuff all the time, and when they said it to me it was always condemning, because it made me feel like it was my fault that I couldn’t hear Him… What God has taught me, is that He is the One who allows us to hear Him. He is the One who opens our ears. Faith comes by hearing, and hearing by the Word of God… Jesus is the Word of God, hearing can only come by Him, a Good Gift, and the more you hear Him the more Faith you get because His word always accomplishes its purpose. Every time. That’s why when we become new Christians it is always so hard for the first few years (for a lot of people, but not everyone)… because there are a lot of spirits out there that tell people what to do, and there is also the flesh… When we grow up, all throughout our lives, these things get us to trust them, they are false prophets… But the thing is, is that even false prophets have the power to make accurate prophecies. Balaam (Old Testament) is an example in the Bible… We don’t know that he was a false prophet until Jesus tells us so in the New Testament. But his prophecies still came true. So this is what God does, when somebody gets saved, He starts to make everything that they trust, that is not Him start to fail. Everything that they have relied on since the day they were born. And then He starts putting more of Himself into them, causing them to be more like Him. Isaiah 44:25 says, “I am the One who exposes the false prophets as liars by causing events to happen that are contrary to their predictions.” And 26 says, “But I carry out the predictions of my prophets!” This is what Jesus does for those He loves. The hard things is that we, before we were saved, had always put our trust in things that may not have been of God, and when God causes them to fail, to set us free, a lot of the time it feels like we are failing. And God wants to remove everything that is trying to keep you in bondage, and replace it with His Spirit. And for Him to do that, you have to spend time with Him, and build a relationship with Him. And that’s what it’s all about… Having a relationship with God. I pray that God will change your husband, and that He will speak to him, and encourage him to change his mind. I pray that he will become more like Jesus everyday. In Jesus’ name, Amen. God bless you.
-Steven