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How I know for fact that God will restore your marriage! For all needing restoration
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Posted by: Kristie
My marriage is restored, we see so many others post praise reports of restoration, and we wonder what about ours Lord, when will it ever happen for me. Will it even happen for me???
Yes, it will. If you stand firm in your faith and trust in Gods word, it will happen to you too! God is no respecter of persons, and He does not tell lies, it is in fact impossible for Him to lie. If He said it, He meant it and He will do it!
How do I know for a fact He will do it? His word is truth, and nothing short of truth, and this is what He says about marriage:
(People now seek worldly solutions for broken marriages, but His word says about His children..) "But you are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, a peculiar people." 1Pet. 2:9 (We are not to follow the world and what they do, but His word, what He tells us to do.)
"Consequently they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate." Matt. 19:6 AND THE TWO SHALL BECOME ONE FLESH; consequently they are no longer two, but one flesh." Mark 10:8
God says that He hates divorce! He says, "For I hate divorce says the Lord." Malachi 2:16. He never changes His mind..."Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today, yes and forever." Heb. 13:8
You are not an exception with Him, "I most certainly understand that God is not One to show partiality." Acts 10:34 (God is not a respecter of persons, again, what He did for me, what He did for Kari, what He did for all those that have came here for prayer restoration and have one day posted their praise report of the return of a spouse, of marriage restoration, HE WILL DO FOR YOU TOO! HE PROMISES SUCH BECAUSE HIS WORD SAYS HE IS'NT PARTIAL TO SOME AND NOT TO OTHERS.
"but I say to you that everyone who divorces his wife, except for the cause of unchastity, makes her commit adultery; and whoever marries a divorced woman commits adultery." Matt. 5:32 "And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for immorality, (fornication, KJV), and marries another woman commits adultery." Matt. 19:9 and more of the same in Mark 10:11, Luke 16:18, Rom. 7:3, Prov. 6:32, Lev. 20:10.
Note: The word adultery really means after marriage, and the word fornication means before marriage, they are two separate sins and should not be confused.
So what about those of you who are fighting for a second or third marriages then, maybe people are telling you that this marriage is not covenant and therefore is not right in the eyes of God and He will not restore. That is a absolute lie!
Yes, you should have fought for that first marriage, but you didnt for whatever reason, maybe you did not know Gods word then and did not know you should have. You sinned, we all sin and fall short of the glory of God. That is why He sent His only begotten son to pay the price for our sins. Jesus says, Repent, go and sin no more. That other broken marriage is done and gone and as long as you ask for forgiveness for that mistake, He is more then willing to forgive you. He does not want yet another convenant you have made with a new spouse to fall to sin just because it is not the first one. You are forgiven and now He wants you to sin no more. Meaning, do not divorce again, do not break covenant yet again, then you will be caught up in inquity, doing the same sin over and over. No...He wants you to do right with this one and heed His word this time around. You are healed, go and sin no more!
God does not expect you to back track to that first marriage, forsaking the new convenant with this spouse. How do I know this? Read Deut. 24:1-4. In this passage He tells a woman not to go back to her first husband.
Those who hold to covenant marriages (covenant keepers), (and which by their terms covenant refers only to the first marriage), believe that God does not recognize second marriages. However nowhere is this stated in scripture, and this passage of Deut. 24:1-4 in fact contradicts this "first covenant" theology.
I call all marriages covenant...because a covenant is a vow to or before God, a vow before God and to God, and any marriage is a vow before God and sealed by God. Anytime you make a vow to or before God, you are making a covenant with Him, everytime you marry someone you are making a covenant to God and to that person you are marrying. A covenant is just that, a covenant..be it the first, second or tenth one made. Read Mal. 2:14 for what covenant marriage is. "Because the Lord has been a witness between you and the wife of your youth", "though she is your companion and wife by covenant".
It is very serious to break a covenant with God. He says to make your No mean No, and your Yes mean Yes, and not to make vows lightly to Him. Again, you need to ask forgiveness of any prior covenant breakings, and know you are forgiven by the blood of Jesus, and repent to never do it again..meaning...to not break this covenant as well! Gods word on divorce is for all covenant marriages, be it the first, second or more. In this passage, God is telling this woman to not go back to the first husband who gave her a certificate of divorce if her current husband divorces her also or dies, because it would be adultery. Why would it be adultery, because God holds this second marriage as covenant..all the divorce scriptures belong to this marriage just as much as they did to the womans first marriage. It is a new covenant and it falls under all the marriage covenant rules in the word of God.
I also know this is true from my personal relationship with God, I did not have to be shown His word on this. I am not in that first marriage. I was divorced, I was married to a man who was a drug addict, alcoholic, wife beater. For ten years he beat me daily, we had four kids. The last three years of that marriage I walked with God. I accepted Christ in the midst of all this. Even then, I saw no out but to divorce him and I did. I did not know then that if I gave it to God and prayed for this husband, that God would help, would change him, would make the marriage right. I know now that God would have done such for that marriage, it did not matter what was going on...God can fix anything and will when it comes to marriage. Now I know, and I realize that I did the wrong thing, and I ask for forgiveness which is mine through Jesus. I prayed for one solid year for God to bring me a new spouse, God knows I am not the kind of person to be alone, I need a mate..I am that one He talks about in His word that is best to be married! I prayed for a Christian husband, and God brought Kevin to me. Even a year later, right before we were to marry, I had doubts and tried to run away from the relationship and God blocked me and stopped me in my tracks. Used two Baptist ministers to send messages to me. One stopped mid sentence in preaching the service on the day I was planning on leaving, he looked me in the eye and said, "God says you are to stay right where He put you and are not to go anywhere!". Then he went right back to preaching like he was never interrupted. I had another minister come up to me and tell me that God had spoke to him and instructed him to tell me that I was to stay put, that where I was is where He intends for me to be. God does not get any louder then that!! And this was not a first marriage. God put me and Kevin together in this second marriage, and any and every time I was ready to throw in the towel, any time I have begged God to let me throw in the towel, He has been just a loud to tell me again and again, "No!, Stay where I have put you and have faith in Me." So here I am folks. It would have been easier to bail and get a new man, I will tell you that...but...it probably wouldnt have because it would have been a sin, a breaking of covenant when I knew better, and the new one most likely would have been worse because he would not have been a God thing. I ask covenant keepers to explain all of this with us if my marriage to Kevin is not covenant, not of Gods doings and blessed by Him.
God word is truth, Gods rema word (rema word is God speaking to you or sending personal word to you via others or other means) is truth. God is truth..and God hates divorce, He does not want you or your spouse to divorce, ever..never...no matter what covenant number you are in. If the vows were made, then they are real before God. He even hates divorce so much..that He would prefer His children stay in a marriage with a non-believer then to divorce them, saying that the believing spoue may lead the unbelieving spouse to the Lord. He states, Do not be unequally yoked (do not marry a unbeliever), but lets you know that if you already have done so, then stay in the marriage. He is the same about marriages beyond the first one. If you already have divorced and remarried, broke one convenant and made a new one, then stay in the new one...do not break yet another one, sin yet again. Stop here and trust in Me for healing, restoration.
Now...know that without a doubt, God detests divorce, hates it, says no to it, it does not matter what the marriage number is because it is not about numbers, it is about a vow, a covenant, a promise to God and to someone else in Gods witness & blessing. Gods word, no matter how many scriptures you look up on divorce, is the same throughout...NO to divorce. Even in adultery, He did not want divorce, He says He only allows it because of the hardening of mans heart. This still means no, it means no...but for this reason I will forgive you if you do, still I will be happier if you do not! With God feeling this way about divorce, all this word from Him on the subject, do you think for one minute that if you are seeking Him to stop your divorce and restore your marriage, that He will not do so??! God clearly says that anything you ask of Him that is in His will, He will do! What is Gods will when it comes to divorce? NO! The word no to divorce is Gods will on the subject! So if you seek Him to stop divorce in your family, to heal and restore, know without a doubt that He will do so. That is His will, you asked Him to do something in His will, so it is cut and dried according to His word.
Do not give up. The only weapon the enemy has against you in the restoration of your marriage is time, and that is what he uses the most to break you down and make you give up. We have settled there the fact that God will restore your marriage, there is no question about that, but the enemy knows that too...and he can postpone Gods plan, make it take longer...and I hate to say it, but it is through us, the ones seeking restoration that he does this, not the missing spouse. Every single time he can work on our minds and make us doubt, make us feel weak and tried and make us have thoughts of giving up, thoughts of doubt, anger, anything negative to our situation, he sets us back in our restoration. The miracle comes through unwaivering faith and trust in Gods doing what He promises. And it seems so simple is the ironic part. In knowing Gods will, His word, and knowing that without a doubt He will restore marriages of those who seek Him for such..why should we even be entertaining anything the enemy trys to hand us on the situation. He is a liar, we know that. God is truth, he is lies. So why do we even stop for one second and listen to him? We all do though...every one of us do...patience is the hardest part, time can seem like it is killing you sometimes, and it is worse when you know that it feels that way but with every single time you entertain the devils lies, you have just extended that time some more! OUCH! I just say this because I want all of you to know that you are not alone on this, it is the hardest part for each and every one of us, the biggest struggle, and can at times seem like a very unfair thing that the hardest thing of all is the very thing that causes the hardest thing to be. Like a vicious circle. But, you will make it. I went through it, I felt that way too, the devil tripped me over and over, I bought myself more time many times, but I still came out the end to restoration. The enemy can trip you up, you can fall again and again to his manipulations, but it makes no difference, God always prevails in the end. If you can just understand this concept, you can shorten that time in using the wisdom to gain as much control of your thoughts and actions as you can and keep on top of it....ever watchful and wise to the enemies snares, side stepping them more then stepping in them.
Your restoration is one the way..do not lose hope...it is right around the corner...and you too will be posting your praise report and moving on to a battle to keep the enemy out (Yep, restoration is not the end of it, that just ticked him off more, you will be victorious over him and heading up the mountain side instead being in the valley, but you will still have to keep protection up and defend your ground, fending him off whenever he trys to come in again.)
God bless all of you...I will see you happy in the restoration of the Lord, all glory be unto Him! :-)
Posted by: Copper
thank you kristie, for writing this, oh thnk you i have printed it and am going to go reread it and pray over it.
thank you and May our Father Bless you immensely!
luv you, kimberly
Posted by: thornygrace
Kristy, It is amazing that you wrote this. I was praying with a prayer warrior from a religious show on Angel One yesterday and she said basically the same things.
One of the things she said is that all things that happen to us comes through God. s. has to have God's permission to be destructive to our lives and our marriages. But God loves us very deeply, so deep that he knows the number of hairs on our heads. He doesn't want us to end up destroyed or damaged by any of these events. These are just being used to refine us. To refine silver the heat under the metal must be raised up very high. Then the scum is s********ped off the top surface (as it rises due to the heat.) Then the heat is increased again and the scum (the impurities) surface again. And again, the they are s********ped off.
This process lasts as long as there are impurities to be s********ped when refining silver.
But God knows that we can only take so much. So we have phases in our lives when there isn't much heat and we have blessings even though we are impure. But those are just rest times and God knows that what we need are the times of pressure to refine us again and again. This matures us as Christians.
Rarely does times of blessing mature us. (Oh how I wish this was the case!) Everyone has to have some trouble in their life in order to mature as Christians. This is part of what Paul was talking about when he said that the thorn in his side could not be removed and he said the answer was that Jesus was sufficient for him and that this thorn in his side was used to perfect Paul for the work he did. (I don't have the actual quotes so forgive me if I am miss speaking.)
The prayer warrior on the phone said that God knew this time of problem in my marriage was going to occur and that He knew I could handle it. He has a perfect plan in the midst of all of this.
And that plan is for me to mature in my Christian walk. After-all that is more important than anything. She told me to stop making my marriage the center of my life and to remember that that place belongs only to God.
And again, God is doing a work in my husband's life too. (perhaps helping him be more open to salvation in Jesus.)
I think that what this woman was saying applies to all of us.
How we can mess up God's perfect plan is to be impatient and to step out from under God's authority and to try to solve things ourselves. We need to turn this situation over to God and let Him solve it. If we need to do something, it will be made very clear to us. And when that occurs, it will not be because we feel desperate and overly emotional. When something is from God, it has an entirely different and calmer or peaceful emotion with it. (for the most part.)
"Be still and know that I am God." (I (God) am in charge. I will take care of you. I know more than you do about your spouse and the things coming up in your life so trust Me. I will make all things turn to good if you will stop trying to fix them yourself and focus instead of me.)
I think I am finally getting the message. Praise God.
Posted by: Debi16
Amen Kristie!!! I couldn't have said it any better. I think God is using you to boost the standers on this board now. Alot of us have came so close to giving up. You are truly a blessing! Thank You Lord God for this wonderful, faithful woman, Father bless her life and marriage mightily!!!
Debi
Posted by: Kristie
Kimberly, you are very welcome, it is truth, and it applies to you. I know you have struggled for a time now, you were here when I came and still here now. You are strong and you have proved that, there is no doubt of restoration for you, just try to not let the enemy add time to your situation, which is very hard, but it can be done. I think this finally got through to me when one night Kevin called me and was very cold and hurtful, saying it was over, no matter what, he was done and moving on, that he did not love me anymore. I was hysterical, called my mentor, Pastor Frank, a very strong man in Christ, and a prophet (messenger of Gods word) and seer as I call him, God lets him see things that we cannot, he has a special gift of God. I think the one word for that in the Bible is decernment. Anyway, I called him and blubbered all that Kevin had said and how this was taking so long, all this time passed and he was still so cold. Frank very unmercibly and sharply said, "Do you understand that Gods word is the truth?!." Yes... "Do you believe Gods word on divorce is truth then?" Yes..."Then why are you calling me up blubbering when you know better! When you know that it does not matter what Kevin says, because God is in control and He says differently! All you are doing is blubbering about how long this is taking, but by doing so, lacking faith, you just extended the time you will be waiting! If you know the truth, then stand on the truth and know it not stumbling, not letting the enemies lies catch your foot in a snare, and stop crying and start praising instead!."
He was harsh with me. But He was telling the truth. It is hard for those in the valley with you to see you cost yourself more time, or the enemy decieving you into stumbling and postponing Gods work. I am sure the devil gets glee from it, he cannot win, but he can score points along the way that just makes the game last longer, so to speak.
ThornyGrace, you are very correct. God uses trials to refine us, to bring us closer to His throne. The more we are refined, the wiser in Christ we become, the greater warriors for His Kingdom we become. God does allow trials to come to refine us, to take us to higher levels in him. Then sometimes it is not God letting us come into a trial because He feels we need to go up a level, but instead the enemy working on our spouses and our spouses falling to his deception, then God uses us to pray them out because that is our assignment as children of God and to our spouses..we love them, we will fight for them. I actually had a woman call me one day, and it was at a moment that I was in hysterics again...heard something I did not want to hear I am sure. She identified herself as being from a ministry and that God laid it on her heart to call me. Then she started telling me that God showed her that if it were not for me praying for my husband, fighting for him, hanging on and refusing to let the enemy have him, he would be lost for good. That God knew this time would come for my husband, and He gave my husband the perfect spouse for him, the only one in the world that would stick by him and pray him out, so not to believe the devils lies, and anything that my husband says is nothing but the devils lies coming through him to try to make me let go. To rebuke the words, and stand strong, believe what God says, not my husband as he is in captivity and being used by the enemy like a puppet.
No matter how we got here, be it our time to move up a level, or due to someone we love opening the door to the enemy and allowing him to use him for a puppet, God definitely refines us in the process because it has become a trial for us, their falling affects us deeply, sometimes more then it does them..or at least that is how it appears, but truth be known...they are in turmoil, being led down the wrong path by the enemy is never a picnic, even if it appears they are having fun on the outside..sin is death on the inside. My husbands broken state on the day he returned is proof of that..suddenly he was not having fun, turned out he had not been for some time, he was a train wreck!
God always has His hand upon us though..always, He says that none of us can be snatched from His hand. He has His hand upon our spouses also. I think most of our refinement comes from God allowing the enemy to tinker with us in the trial, deceive us, and play his little tricks, that helps us grow, that is what turns us into mighty warriors, because everytime he gets one over on us, it costs us and we learn. The more we learn, the wiser we become in Christ. And you are correct, many times this will not come to the end (which is victory and restoration without a doubt as we said) until we are learned up. Trials always lead to higher levels in Christ, and if we are in the trial because God says it is time, then the trial must persist until we hit that level. We can wrap it up sooner if we simply open ourselves wide open to God and the Holy Spirit and let them have their way with us. Obediance! God can mold us quickly if we do not fight him. Those are great words, some of my favorites in fact, be still and know He is God. I know one thing, I can vouch for the fact that I have been saved since 1979, but literally up until the last three years, I had no growth, the past three years I have been refined and have grown so much that I do not know myself, that old person. A person who was what I call religious. Now I am a person who personally knows the Lord, who has a relationship with Him. He has changed me so much that my old ways, my old friends, my old hobbies, my old beliefs, they are all alien to me now..and I have no desire for them. The only desire I have is to be with my Lord, to talk to Him every day, all day, to be with Him in His house every time the doors are open, and to be with my brothers and sisters in Christ everytime I am provided the opportunity. Anything not of God, holds no interest to me, repels me actually. I am constantly conscious of who I am and what I am doing, is it pleasing to God? It has to be pleasing to God. Sometimes I think my husband has trouble with me because I am not the wife he knew, the one he married, I am not even a shred of a bit of what I was three years ago. I think sometimes he feels like I am a stranger, that he does not know how to take me, or feels intimidated to approach me. Maybe it is scary for him even..Pastor warned the men in our church that one of the most insane things a man could do was cause harm to a daughter of God. He said to think how much earthly fathers are protective and defensive over their daughters, and then try to imagine how much more protective and defensive God is over His daughters..treating them badly is a really really stupid idea! lol!
Debi,
I would hope that God could use me as a vessel to help everyone else. I think those of us that have walked through this fire already and come out the other end, need to let our brothers and sisters still in the fire know they will come out, and do so victoriously just as we did. We know how that fire feels, we know how tired you get, how the enemy works on your mind, the lonliness, the hopelessness sometimes, we have felt every single emotion and cried every single tear that those of you in the fire are going through. God blessed us, kept His word to us, His promise, and I think that in honor of God, we need to be the hand and the voice to let those in the fire still, know it will be okay..there really is a end, and there really is victory at the end..and most importantly..you are not alone, everything you feel, struggle with, all of it is normal for the trial you are in..and therefore you are no different then me or all those that came out of it restored..that God truly is not a respecter of persons, and He will bring you out just as He did me and the others. For some it is a short trip through the fire, for some it is a long time, no matter what the duration time of your trial, it makes no difference, you will come out victorious in the Lord! Praise God!
I had to be reminded of that often when it was me. Others helped me, and God wants me to help others. That should be part of my thanks to Him, and my obligation to my brothers and sisters! :-)
God bless all of you...I want to be here to celebrate restoration with you! Praise God, He is good!
Posted by: Copper
bumpety bump bump bump.
good thread.
Posted by: mortischaray
Thank you so much for these encouraging words of wisdom and truth.
I am on my third marriage and am yet again seperated. I have only recently asked our Lord and Saviour to enter my heart and was deeply concerned about having had two previous marriages. I wondered if God would ever recognize this marriage. I am now so clear on all of it after reading the words you wrote.
I thankyou from the bottom of my heart.
I knew there was something on here that God wanted me to read as i read this site everyday searching for an answer to my question, now he has given it to me.
Praise the Lord and Godbless you.
Debbie