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A Ham Sandwich with Mustard!
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Posted by: akabezalel
Prepare yourself for laughter 
As ham sandwiches go, it was perfection. A thick slab of of ham, a fresh
bun, crisp lettuce and plenty of expensive, light brown, gourmet
mustard.
The corners of my jaw aching in anticipation, I carried it to the picnic
table in our backyard, picked it up with both hands but was stopped by
my wife suddenly at my side. "Hold Johnny [our six-week old son) while
I get my sandwich," she said.
I had him balanced between my left elbow and shoulder and was reaching
again for the ham sandwich when I noticed a streak of mustard on my
fingers.
I love mustard. I had no napkin. I licked it off.
It was not mustard.
No man ever put a baby down faster!
It was the first and only time I have sprinted with my tongue protruding.
With a washcloth in each hand I did the sort of routine shoeshine boys do, only I did it on my tongue.
Later...(after she stopped crying from laughing so hard)...my wife said,
"Now you know why they call that mustard 'Poupon'.
Posted by: StarChilde
the timing for reading this could not have been worse... just got done changing both kids' pants! All I could think of was how glad I am that I washed my hands... and that I don't use Grey Poupon! heheh
Posted by: KingdomWarrior
Oh, this is terrible
Posted by: faith rising
I got this at work in my e-mail. I laughed so hard!
Posted by: MaryTemp
LOL!!! This was truly very funny. Thanks!
Posted by: prayingwifeforhubby
Very funny, in an eewww, warped kind of way! lol I was picturing it happening to my husband, and how he would have reacted! lol