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So Tired

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Posted by: bookgirl

Ever since I got the divorce papers I've been so afraid and dreading March 30th. What if the divorce goes through? I don't know if I can keep standing. It's been over 5 months now since he left and there's no change in him he is just so set on getting this divorce. I don't know if I can wait anymore I am so tired and weary of waiting. I am tired of crying all the time even with being on these anti-depression pills the counslor said I needed to be on. I don't know who I am without him, I love him so much. I don't know how to live with this pain. If I don't get a breakthrough soon I don't think I can keep it up.


Posted by: Shelia66

Wendy,

I feel your pain as if it were my own. I am praying for a breakthrough for you. I know it is hard not to become discouraged. I have felt attacked by the enemy for the last week or so.

I have decided to focus less on Jim and more on my walk with Christ. I have called a homeless shelter to see if I could volunteer a couple days a week. We need to keep our minds occupied so that it doesn't become a breeding place for satan to put the negative thoughts.

I am diabetic and have a few pounds to lose too, so I am concentrating in that area as well. I have ask God to give me a sign on my restoration and everything I am doing in regards to it and I feel that He will in his time, not my fleshy time.

I am building kinships on this site. When I am down, this is where I come and it has definitely fueled my spirit. Other standers have given me insight as what to do and what is yet to come. This standing is not for the weak, because satan uses weakness against us. I'm not perfect and I have my tearful days, but I'm getting stronger in the Lord every day.

I will pray for you Wendy and you pray for me and we will agree on our restored marriages together.

Love to you, my sister in Christ
Shelia


Posted by: HopeNFaith

Wendy sweetie, they are just papers, man made, ive been there i was sooo afraid for November 12th to come. But god is soooo gracious, i remember Nov 11, i had the most horrible day, my life played over and over before my eyes all dya, i cried i scremed you name it. at 12 30 novemeber 12th i was on the phone with my prayer partner... all of a sudden God spoke to me Christi Lay it down, lay it down NOW. i got on my face repeating over and over its yoursLord, repeating the 23rd Psalm.. it went through, but God wrapped me in his arms of love and i had such peace that day. To me im still married, im married in Gods eyes, but i do know your fear, your pain, your panic, Lay it down completely knowing that it is just a piece of paper, and sometimes they do have to go through to bring it back to life in HIS way... I will continue to pray for you for it not to go through for God to stop it, let go sweetie, just let it go.. he is with you he is working and he will never leave you. He can stop it you have to trust him, i still wasnt trusting back in Novemeber, dont know if thats why it went through, but ive been ok with it not overjoyed but knowing that when he brings it back around ti will be so much more beautiful than it ever was. Love ya girl and im praying, Give it to him, when we give him everything, he returns it with HIS blessing.

Christi


Posted by: faithstander

Wendy, I know how you feel cause I've been there myself. I think it's often hard for us women to have an identity separate from our husbands. They are our covering, our head, and when they leave, it's like our insides are ripped out. But, we are one with them so that makes sense. However, ultimately, God wants us to only be that dependent upon him. He didn't just create us to be our husband's wives. He wants to use us for his glory with our giftings and abilities that he has given us. Right now, we all have to focus upon God and our own relationship with him. I know you miss your hubby terribly and I miss mine so very much (especially after seeing him last night lol!), but this is only a season, it's not permanant. God has already won this victory Wendy. As far as God is concerned, there is no mountain here, because all the mountains were brought down when Jesus died and was resurected. Our enemy was defeated then. One word from God will send every demon to flight. They have NO power against God. We are the ones who limit God with our thinking. God has been teaching me about living in HIS reality instead of my own. This is what living in the spirit is all about. There is no reason to fear. God is the one who is really in control here. It doesn't matter what the circumstances look like because the circumstances are the world's reality and that's not God's reality!


Dear Father, I lift Wendy up to you and ask you to hide her in the shadow of your wings and fill her with your love and comfort. Lord, give her the strength and faith she needs to do your will. I rebuke all fear and doubt from her in Jesus name, and ask you to loose your perfect peace upon her. I rebuke the spirit and curse of divorce from Wendy, her husband, and their marraige in the name of Jesus. I ask you Lord to loose your Holy Spirit of Love, submission, faithfulness, and commitment upon her husband, and to stop all divorce proceedings in Jesus Name. Your word says that you hate divorce, so we know this is not of you, therefore we reject it. I ask you to take out her husband's stony heart and give him a heart of flesh. I ask you to place the fear of God within him and speak loudly and clearly to him 24 hours a day and bring him to repentance. I thank you for the victory that has already been won. I thank you all you are doing and about to do in Jesus precious name, amen.


Posted by: christythompson

Dear Wendy,
You are not alone....
God is bigger than all our pain...
You can tell him how you feel, he can handle it. This divorse is not the end...
Never lose sight that God loves you, and even though he allows us to be hard of heart and divorse, it is not his will. Obviously its your husbands will, but not Gods. He sees your every tear and the extreme anquish you feel. Man will let us down but God is what is ever true and ever sure. He can and will carry you and your burdens if you let him.....Seek in with all your heart and he will give you the desires of your heart. Who is to say, your husband won't return and remarry you. I have known that to happen.

Jesus I lift Wendy up to you. Heal her from the extreme pain she is in and give her hope that you love her and you will never fail her. jesus I pray that Christian men come into her husbands live and that he might find salvation. Hela her marriage. Give Wendy dignity and let her not grovel in pitifulness, pick her up and wipe her tears and give her peace.

"Love Must be Tough" By James Dobson may help you its about dealing with what you are going through and the goal of restoration. Tough means strong in this book.