Pages: 1

I Think Danny And I Are Going To Try One More Time

(Click here to view the original thread with full colors/images)

Posted by: alexx

I Really Dont Even Know If I Still Love Him After All I've Been Thru...but I Do Miss My Family...life Has Been Disfunctional Without It.....my Kids Hate Him...his Kids Tolerate Him...we Have A New Grandbaby.....just Pray That God Protects My Heart And That Im Able To Forgive ...cause I Know I Have To For This To Ever Work....in A Way I Feel Like Im Taking A Step Backward Here...but Our Little Boys Are Happy


Posted by: GA5966

Alexx,
This is a big step. I don't know the circumstances that you and Danny have been through. I know from my own experience that God will put a marriage back together. Seek God first and then listen to what he says.

Father,
Light the path that Alexx is to take. I ask you to make her paths straight and show her what you want for her. I know you hate divorce but I know that in an abusive realationship you want no woman to stay. Father, I ask for Alexx to have peace and know the right thing to do. What ever that is I ask you to let her feel you walking with her all the way. In Jesus Name,Amen.


Posted by: Sulten

Dear Lord in Heaven, I pray that Lisa will be guided by Thy hand all the things You would have her do in this situation. I pray for wisdom and clairity and discernment. I pray in Jesus Holy name amen.





_____________________________

Please lift the families who have broken homes on this board. There are far too many - please pray for them. Prayer produces change.

http://www.annointed.net/ForumTopic_43451__15.htm


Posted by: JeriRose12

Are you sure this is what God wants? The Bible says that you have grounds for divorce (the adultery).... Don't get so hung up on being "the good Christian wife" that you don't take up Your God given right to free yourself from a situation that keeps the wound bleeding and raw. If he comes back to you, what assurance do you have that he will stay there and do what he should? Has his pattern shown that he will treat you and the children with the respect you deserve? I believe his pattern is obvious. He may say (as have SO many) that they will never do it again....only to do it again.

Dear Lord, please show Alexx plainly what she is to do, so there is NO question about it! Do not let her do what the church says is "right" and be held in the legalistic and religious traditions of men. Saving the marriage at any cost is not Biblical. God ALWAYS comes first, even before a marriage. If Danny is doing things that are sinful and she is seeming to say that is OK by letting him come back each time.... what is she telling her children? Well, dear Lord, this in Your hands. I give it all to You. You can heal this marriage, but I do not believe she should accept him back until she sees clear repentance and transformation. How many times will she let him come back and then go out and do it again? The Bible plainly says for reason of adultery, she can divorce. Show her what to do and what You are wanting. In Jesus Name, amen.

~JeriRose~
Finding HIM in 2005


Posted by: ninababy73

Lisa, I have said this all before, but truly see the need in repeating it as I am afraid that you are going to make a drastic mistake for you and the boys. You have compromised greatly in your marriage to Danny. You have done, allowed things in your home and put up with things all in trying to keep Danny happy. NO MORE. You need to communicate that effectively to Danny. NO MORE. No more compromising, no more allowing, no more turning blind eyes. NO MORE . No more lying, no more cheating, no more. He needs to know in no uncertan terms NO MORE .

Danny needs to know in no uncertain terms that if he is to come home, then you expect the following from him:
Marital Counseling
No Drug Use
No Communication with the other woman.............period/no wavering.
Back to church fulltime
Steady employment
No hanging out w/the fellows, no hanging out at the bar,etc.

This revolving door thing is not going to work any longer. If he comes home, he must be certain that he is going to stay. It is not fair to you or Eli & Alexx to keep going through this emotional ringer all because Danny can't make up his mind what he wants or who he wants.

You have provided a crutch for Danny. He knows that he can do whatever, be with whoever and you will take him back and that is NOT right. You need to stand up and decide that being his emotional doormat is not what marriage is all about. You have had many problems with Danny and your marriage even before this latest affair. It is time to stop being afraid of being alone and start living the life that God wants you to live.

Also, you said that the boys are happy that daddy is home. Think of your boys, what kind of example of manhood are you and Danny showing them. Right now, the picture they have is is okay to sleep around on mommy, it is okay to use drugs, it is okay to not be responsible to family, etc. They are young now but the picture is clear and will be with them as they grow up.

I know that you love Danny very much. Having this happen to you again in another marriage has been very hard for you and my heart goes out to you; however, as I have said repeatedly, you need to make the right choices for you and your children and I mean that.

There is nothing wrong with wanting your family to be whole again with Danny back in the picture; however, if he is only coming home because things aren't rosy with the OW or he knows that he can come back to you whenever he wants under the same terms as before then you are opening yourself up to a lifetime of continued heartache with Danny.

Sister, I love you. You know I do. I want nothing more for you to be happy; however, opening yourself back to Danny in this way is just setting yourself up for a lifetime of hurt and what will happen is you will be writing another post of Danny leaving you or Danny not doing that. You need to heal, mentally, emotionally and spiritually.

Father, I lift Lisa up to You. Give her wisdom to make the right choices for her family and her household. If Danny is to come home, may he come home changed and ready to be the husband and father that you have destined him to be. May he seek Your face and claim the gift of salvation that You have waiting for him. Give Lisa peace during all of this. Clear her mind and quiet her soul. Give her the strength and courage to do what is right for her and her children so that she is not consistly setting herself up where Danny is concerned. If he is to come back into this home, Father, let it be after some time and after some serious counseling, marital and drug, is completed. Let her not be deceived by the promises spoken by Danny, promises of I am sorry will never do this again. Father, may Lisa truly seek You. Let she look to You for solace and peace. Let her seek You instead of chasing after this man who has so greatly broken her heart. Let her heal, and be at peace. So be it, Lord, I pray. Amen


Posted by: ninababy73

My post to Lisa (alexx) is specific to what all I have known from her in regards to her marriage. There is MUCH more going on within the walls of this marriage. So much that is not mentioned in the post. My response to Lisa is in regards to all that I know in that marriage.

Yes, people do change who have cheated, but this is a habitually thing between the two in this marriage. Drug, use, etc. runs rampant in this marriage and there are 2 children less than 6 to consider.

Counseling needs to be done before Danny comes back into this household. Lisa doesn't want to be alone so she is willing to continually allow Danny to run back in forth within the walls of her marriage and that is a dangerous thing to allow.

God does still work miracles in marriage and obviously He has worked one within yours but there is sooooo much more going on within this marriage that the board my not be aware of and the people who do are responding in kind.


Posted by: GA5966

Nina is right Lisa. The best thing for you to do is follow her advice. The only way a marriage can work is if it is the biblical marriage. This requires you to be able to trust each other and feel safe with each other. If you see a pattern in this man of abuse and infidelity then you should take the door God has opened and take the kids and get out. Pray for Danny but get out. Bobbie


Posted by: christythompson

Lisa, I agree with Nina
God won't protect you if you won't protect yourself.
Remember working comprimises isn't with what is written below.
He has given your kids good right to feel what they do.
Why do you believe him?
What changes has he made that you comprimise your little boys?
They may be happy but you are the parent.
We war with spiritual principalities, so when the home is comprimised
Your family comes under demonic influence and attack.
Jesus
I pray for wisdom on Lisa's part
Let her be swift in her decisions regarding Danny.
Let her close the door on first sign on unrepentance.
I do pray danny lay down his life to Christ
Living only as a Christian man
not found in bars, not having a few drinks, not using drugs
not being secretive, laying his life open and honest.
God touch this situation and let anything
done in secret be brought to light!


Quote:
Originally Posted by ninababy73
My post to Lisa (alexx) is specific to what all I have known from her in regards to her marriage. There is MUCH more going on within the walls of this marriage. So much that is not mentioned in the post. My response to Lisa is in regards to all that I know in that marriage.

Yes, people do change who have cheated, but this is a habitually thing between the two in this marriage. Drug, use, etc. runs rampant in this marriage and there are 2 children less than 6 to consider.

Counseling needs to be done before Danny comes back into this household. Lisa doesn't want to be alone so she is willing to continually allow Danny to run back in forth within the walls of her marriage and that is a dangerous thing to allow.

God does still work miracles in marriage and obviously He has worked one within yours but there is sooooo much more going on within this marriage that the board my not be aware of and the people who do are responding in kind.



Posted by: alexx

Thank You All For Your Prayers And Your Advise......you Have Said The Same Things To Me That I Have Heard From Others As Well As Have Told Myself Over And Over Again.....maybe Its The Holidays...the Lonliness...the Memories Of Christmas's In The Past....maybe Its My Lack Of Self Worth....maybe Its The Love Thats Still In My Heart...or My Ability To See The Good In People.....whatever It Is That Causes Me To Take Him Back I Dont Know......and I Know Unless Some Miraculous Changes Are Made That It Will Fail And I Will Cry Again.......my Emotions Are All Over The Place...ive Never Been So Conficted In My Life Before.....my Job Is So Much Harder....foreclosure On My House Is Set For The 7th....im Tired....im Just So Tired Mentally...maybe Thats Why Im Just Laying Down And Letting Life Happen...i Dont Know...but I Am So Appreciative Of Your Prayers...from The Bottom Of My Heart I Am


Posted by: ninababy73

Father God, You are our Comforter and today and every day after I pray for Your comforting arms to wrap around Lisa. Hold her tightly in Your arms, not letting her go. Father, her heart cries out and I thank You for hearing her cries. Your Word says that You capture each one of our tears. The enormity of knowing that is amazing as it speaks of Your immense love for us. May Lisa realize and seek the love that You have for her. May she crave and desire it more that her next breathe.

Father, so much is going on emotionally, physically and spiritually within Lisa's life. I pray for Your guidance in each. Show her the direction that she should take in her life. Show her that her self-worth is not wrapped up in some man. She is worth so much to You. May she see that. I pray that one day that Lisa will see herself the way that You see her, beautiful, the precious apple of Your eye, Your daughter. May she see that finally, without question and embrace that.

Father, touch her finances. Help her to get things back in order again so that she can get another home for her and her 2 boys. I pray for favor at her job. Help her to learn everything that is needed and help her to do well. Guide her choices so that she is no longer a doormat to Danny to use.

Father, remove the sadness in Lisa's life. May she give it all to You, vowing never again to pick that up again.

I pray for fullness of peace, joy and happiness to cover Lisa and to become commonplace as she seeks after You fully. So be it, Lord. I pray. Amen


Posted by: christythompson

Lisa
We love you no matter what...
Just remember that!


Posted by: FriendOfGod

O dear gracious Lord, I ask that you would have your will and your way in all of this. Please grant her the wisdom to do whatever is right in this situation. In Jesus name I pray, Amen.


Posted by: FriendOfGod

Quote:
Originally Posted by ninababy73
Father God, You are our Comforter and today and every day after I pray for Your comforting arms to wrap around Lisa. Hold her tightly in Your arms, not letting her go. Father, her heart cries out and I thank You for hearing her cries. Your Word says that You capture each one of our tears. The enormity of knowing that is amazing as it speaks of Your immense love for us. May Lisa realize and seek the love that You have for her. May she crave and desire it more that her next breathe.

Father, so much is going on emotionally, physically and spiritually within Lisa's life. I pray for Your guidance in each. Show her the direction that she should take in her life. Show her that her self-worth is not wrapped up in some man. She is worth so much to You. May she see that. I pray that one day that Lisa will see herself the way that You see her, beautiful, the precious apple of Your eye, Your daughter. May she see that finally, without question and embrace that.

Father, touch her finances. Help her to get things back in order again so that she can get another home for her and her 2 boys. I pray for favor at her job. Help her to learn everything that is needed and help her to do well. Guide her choices so that she is no longer a doormat to Danny to use.

Father, remove the sadness in Lisa's life. May she give it all to You, vowing never again to pick that up again.

I pray for fullness of peace, joy and happiness to cover Lisa and to become commonplace as she seeks after You fully. So be it, Lord. I pray. Amen


I stand in agreement with Nina. Lord, in your mercy hear Nina's prayers. I ask of you in Jesus name I pray, Amen.