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Very Confused Pastor Jerry!

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Posted by: mgarcia

Hi Pastor Jerry:

I would first like to start off by thanking My Lord for leading me to this website..and I ask My Precious Lord to Bless your ministry in Jesus Name.

Pastor Jerry:

My name is Michelle and my husbands name is Mark....My husband left me when I was 7 weeks pregnant and moved in with this police woman. As a result of the choices my husband made he lost his job as a firefighter in the same small town that this police woman works and the town which he and I resided...All of his friends have also turned there backs on him...Now he has made new friends...During the course of pregnancy I have had almost no contact with my husband..with the exception of the two months in Feb and March when he would come home on weekends and would talk about how he could not wait to see his daughter and wanted to be a good husband and father...He had moved to another town 4 hours away for a job..during his move he and this police woman had stopped seeing each other....3 days before he was due to move back into our home and quit his job in that other town..this woman and he started communicating again....and instead of moving back here to me he moved in with her...I have no way of talking to him he has changed his phone numbers and I have been threatened to be arrested for harrassment charges if I try to contact him..His police woman is filling his head with all of these notions and legal mumbo jumbo...I would like to give you a little history on my marriage..My husband and I dated for 2 years....when he finished his fire school and did not get the job he was promised he left town...we had been living in sin for about 3 months....he just packed his things and left...I came home from work and was devistated to find the man I loved was gone...I began crying out to God asking Him to heal my heart and not to bring this man back to San Antonio..(he had moved to a town about 6 hours away with some friends)..for 4 months I prayed God dont bring him back here unless it is YOUR will for us to be married...untill this man is ready to settle down and marry me...I also prayed for God to bless my husband with a job at the fire department here in the town we live in because that job had been promissed to him by the fire chief and I knew my husband needed that job to make him happy and feel like he had accomplished something...at shortly after 4 months my husband called me saying he was ready to come home..he was ready to get married..I was astonished....a day before he came home he received a call from the fire chief at the fire department here stating he had a vacancy and the job was his if he wanted it...I truly believed that God had answered my prayers..and that it was Gods will for us to be married....shortly after we were married I had gotten pregnant and had a miscarriage....this was the third miscarriage from my husband...i no longer wanted to try to get pregnant I felt I had been cursed in my womb and I accepted that...a few months after that my husband had cheated on me....he had been talking to several women and making arrangements to meet them....I found out about it and confronted him and asked him if wanted out of this marriage and he broke down and said no...you are the best woman for me....he then confessed to me that he had slept with someone....i tried my best to forgive him ...but the hurt and lack of trust was still there....6 weeks later this police woman came into the picture and began going to see my husband at work...and call him here at home when i was working and the two of them had sneaked around together...welll when i found this out I confronted him and he packed his things and moved out....I was 5 weeks pregnant at this time...I contacted his Fire Captain and asked him to give my husband the news of my pregnancy....and my husband refused to accept it..2 weeks later he moved in with this police woman and cut off all contact with me..he went and filed divorce papers on the same day he moved in with this police woman....I have never been served with divorce papers as of yet this has been since sept 15 2006, my attorney says that until I am served there is no pending divorce case....My husband shortly after that a couple of days i believe was forced to resign from his postition at the fire department or they would terminate him..all of his friends have washed there hands of him...My husband had turned his back to all of our friends because they tried to tell him that he was wrong and throwing away a good thing....He of course blames me for loosing his job and all of his friends....he feels they took my side.....God had stripped him of this job I had prayed for and of all his friends....He has been unable to get into any other fire departments because of his reputation since this police woman...before he met this woman my husband was hard working and dedicated to his job...being a firefighter was his dream.....God blessed him with that career....my mother payed for his fire school....she was moved to do so by God , I believe...because my mother does not do things like that for people that are not her kin....He is now working for private ambulance services because he is unable to get another fire department job.....I guess what my question to you is....Since God knows everything...God knew what my husband was going to do...why did he bless my womb with this beautiful little girl....the other times I got pregnant I lost the baby...all the same month 3 consecutive years in a row around the same day of the month as well....God hates divorce..God knows that children brought up in fatherless homes have a lot of emotional and sometimes developmental problems...Is it truly God's Will for me to remain married to my husband..I know God hates divorce....but divorce is also permissable if infidelity comes into play...What I am feeling is that God wants me to forgive my husband and to pray for him and for me to just stay still untill eventually God brings him home....But everyone around me says that I am being foolish...that God is not going to change someone who does not want to change...that I am wasting my efforts..and God has given me a way out of this marriage....So why would I be blessed with this little girl...I make very little money..barely getting by .....about to get my electriciy cut off....have to keep borrowing money from my mother.....I am not getting child support the attorney generals office is so slow in this process....So why would and innocent child be subject to this....Please help me to understand..Please tell me what more I need to do....I have been praying on this situation since last September....During the 2 months of Feb and March shortly before the birth of my daughter..my husband had made friends with a man at work...this man would talk about his 2 year old daughter and his relationship with her and talked about how he had cheated on his wife...and how now he realizes how much he loves his wife and daughter and does not ever want to hurt her again...while my husband was friends with this man my husband had a desire to change...but this woman came back in the picture and everything changed again and my husband was no longer talking to this man..and is no longer speaking to me once again...our daughter is two months old now and he has no desire to see her.....Please help me to understand things if you can..Thank You and God Bless You....