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prayer for stepdaughter
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Posted by: stepmom
I am recently married for the second time and my husband has 2 children from his previous marriage. i am in desparate need of prayer for my step daughter because she is going through that rebellious, obnoxious, disrespectful stage and when i make suggestions to my husband he seems to feel i am a nag. please help with some advice
Posted by: Christian Commando
When couples marry and one or both having children from another marriage, its always tougher for the step parent and step children. Good parents always need to become friends first with the children, that the children get to trust tem no matter what.
Knowing each child will look at what happened with thier "blood" parents marriage differently, means realizing each one may have to be dealt with in a different way. Some love the parent more, that left, where some will hate them. The degree of this is infinitiely variable, until you find out what is triggering the chld to react to you- love, jealousy- (your trying to take thier Mom's place), hurt- (the Mother is bad because she left), etc, will you know how to deal with each child's feelings about your marriage to thier Dad and your position in it.
Treat them with love, yet sternness when necessary for them to learn about honor and respect for authority put over them. If appear able to handle it, set them down and explain to them how no, your not thier biological mother, but yes, by marriage now, you are thier legal guardian, that you do love them and care about thier welfare or you would not try to give them rules or requirements to follow to protet them or help them learn.
Be in prayer to God to provide you the right time, place and words for doing such things and for God to touch thier hearts in understanding what you are trying to do.
Also, be in prayer to God each day, that He will guide you what to say, to share with your husband how you love his children and will do as God guides you to raise his children as God knows best, when he - (husband), is not present to work with you to help guide the children. But that both of you need to be on same page for raising the children for guidelines.
I don't know how long you two have been married, but it takes time and alot of patience for a step parent to eventually gain the trust of a child, if approached God guided. Accept the fact you can never replace thier biological parent they have, but you can be thier friend and legal guardian to be there when they need you.
Long before I was born, my Mom and Dad met after my mother divorced her first husband an incurable alcoholic and woman chaser, with Harv, thier son, my oldest 1/2 brother. Dad adopted him legally but Harv was antagonistic at first. It took about 3 years before Harv started getting along with Dad little by little.
In our later years as a family, all Harv ever did was speak good about Dad and calling him his Dad. When we got the call for Mom to know her "ex" had died, she let Hrv. know. Harv told his Mom, why did Ernie die? She said no, your Blood father did. Harv said no, Ernie is my "Blood" father, not this other man.
Harv had, just like your step children can, learn one day to love you too as thier real parent, if you let God guide you thru getting to know them, learning how they can gain your trust, thus show you due honor and respect as thier adopted mother.
It will take some time tho. And you and hubby will have to sit down at some point and work out how this guidance of his children can bring you both on the same page for unity in decisions of raising the children.
As a Minister, I always insisted couples with children from previous marriages, go thru "marriage Counciling" again, but for understanding how this type of marriage needs to be approached and understood, with one or both walking into a "ready made" family as it were.
Lord-
We pray for this family, that you would lead and guide this couple in learning how to work together in unity for the sake of raising the children in a loving, compassionate God centered way, that they too could learn to love accept and follow God, loving and accepting the authority God has placed over them to help them learn and grow in your ways. Bring peace and stability to this family and show all needs and the ways to work them thru that this all can work to Glorify you God. In Jesus Name- Amen!!
Posted by: Beverlyjoy
Having been a stepmother. You will have to trust the Lord in and about everything to se you through because you have been involved with years that have taken place in this childs life that you had nothing to do with. Children of broken marriges hurt so badly inwardly and they react in different ways. Remember no matter what the circumstances that child loves it's mother( I know you are not trying to take the mothers place0 but the real mom and her children feel threatned by you and your relationship with your husband. It will take LOTS of prayer and Godly strength . Just keep a prayer in your heart. Be careful in what you say and do. As a step parent sometimes our best is not good enough
Your husband is going through also because he feels that he is caught in the middle. He knows that you are not a nag. There are times it has to be a hands off situation when it comes to you, but God has your back.
Pray much for him. Be there for your step dtr.Be firm, loving and kind. She eventually will learn that you are not the enemy. When my step-son died many yrs ago and we had come backe from the funeral which was in canada, the only mothers day card I received at that time came from him. My step daughter still calls me mom.My husband and her mother are both deceased. Just do your best and lot God handle it. ( You can pm me if you desire). Dear Lord, I pray that you will bless stepmom with your strengtt and guidance in this situation. Deliver the step dtr from her hurts and sorrows. Bless her to know that YOU and others love her. Deliver her from the spirit of rebellion and disrespect etc. in the mighty name of Jesus.
Posted by: BrendaMagana
I pray mighty Jesus that You move and bring peace in the household of Your freshly married daughter.
Please touch the heart of her step-daughter with Your love and let peace reign between her and her step-mother. Amen